I want so much to be in control.
How many times have you felt this way? The longing to control the situation? The desire to pre-determine the outcome on your terms?
I was thinking about this desire to control this morning as I was attempting to stop my three boys from running around like crazy hyenas as we waited for school to open. No matter what I try, I can’t often control the energy that pours off of them in the mornings. This morning was especially energetic because of it being a dress down day and Catholic Schools Week – God bless their teachers!
There are so many things beyond even my sons’ behavior that I long to control these days. I know I have no ability to control so much, but my personality fights to keep on trying to be master of it all.
Does that resonate with you?
Yesterday, I came across this prayer by Henri Nouwen on @henrinouwensociety that speaks to this desire for control. Maybe it’ll be helpful for all of us who are holding on a little too tight these days:
I so much want to be in control.
I want to be master of my own destiny.
Still I know that you are saying “Let me take you by the hand and lead you. Accept my love and trust that where I will bring you, the deepest desires of your heart will be fulfilled.”
May we be able to loosen our grip a little today and lean into trust. God wants to take our hand but can’t while we are clenching it tight. So let us loosen our grip a little and let God take the lead. I think we will be surprised at the result.