In my life, much like you I presume, I have had many big discernments to make. And with each one… I have always been surprised at the rollercoaster of emotions that comes with it.
It’s never as easy as sitting down and making a pro/con list, is it? ((Oh looky there, 10 pros to 8 cons! That was easy!))
It’s never as easy as folding hands in prayer and saying, “Ok God, whatcha got for me?”, is it? ((Wow this paper just floated into my lap post prayer that says “Do this!” – so cool!))
Truth is, parts of discernment are uncomfortable.
They can even leave you feeling a bit bruised at times.
It’s enough to make you bow out.
But if you don’t get past those parts, you’ll never get to the other side. And that’s where the magic lies.
Still, those uncomfortable parts… they ache. And if you are there right now, maybe this poem I once wrote is for you:
Quite Normal Indeed
I had a nasty,
nasty bruise once.
It was the size
of a baseball.
A black and blue…
Well no..
actually purple
baseball.
It was my fault.
Well no…
actually it was
the table’s fault
for being in
my way.
This bruise,
it took days to heal.
Well no…
actually it took
weeks.
It took so long
I finally asked a doctor:
“Is this normal?”
“Well, yes…”
he assured me
it was.
Quite normal indeed.
I had a nasty,
nasty bruise once
that came
unexpectedly
in the midst
of a BIG
discernment.
I couldn’t
exactly
measure it,
but it felt
LARGE.
I couldn’t
exactly see it
but it felt
purple.
It took so long to heal
I finally asked God:
“Is this normal?”
“Well yes…”
God assured me
it was.
Quite normal indeed.
And so I kept
on going.
(©2022, Gretchen Crowder)
