Earlier this week, I was in my bathroom getting ready while the boys ate breakfast. It hadn’t even been a minute since I left them before I heard, “Mom, where are you mom?” accompanied by three sets of feet shuffling all over the house.
As I stood brushing my teeth, I chuckled at their intense search because I made a point to tell them exactly where I was going before I left them at the breakfast table. “Maybe she is in the garage,” one said as I heard the characteristic “ding” of the garage door. “She’s not there!” he reported. “Maybe she’s in our room,” a twin said as he scampered down the hall. “Nope!” he reported back.
All this time I brushed my teeth and chuckled as an unexpected game of hide and seek ensued. That is until one said, “Did she leave us here all alone?” Grumbling I called, “I’m in the bathroom. What do you need?”
They followed the sound of my voice and rushed into the room asking “Do we have to eat the sausage AND the waffle on our plates?” Sigh.
Many times my boys remind me of sheep without a shepherd. I mean I think they have one in me… and spiritually I hope they have one in God as well. But they seem to need so many things ALL THE TIME. And I don’t always feel like I am the best guide.
I mean the breakfast question was an easy yes. But sometimes they ask bigger questions like the ones they asked when we saw a man with a sign near the car one day: “Where is that man’s family, mom? Doesn’t everyone have a family they can come home to when they are hurting?” Or questions like “Hey mom, when are you gonna die?” Love that one.
I feel grossly unprepared for their questions. I feel grossly unprepared to be their guide.
Yet I was called to be just that.
I wonder if this is how the apostles felt as they walked with Jesus and were tasked to carry on His work. I wonder if they doubted what they had to offer after the master had left. After all He was the shepherd. People were lost and He rounded them up.
Clearly Jesus believed in his apostles ability to be His hands and feet in the world, though. Otherwise He would not have called them.
Clearly He believes in me too.
And you as well.
Have faith that He has given you all you need.